A lady purported to be the world's oldest blogger died in Australia the other day at age 108. 108! Can you imagine any of us will still be blogging at that age? If we are, what do you suppose we'll blog about?
Will we be up on current events, hip to contemporaneous issues? Will fashion and style still make sense to us? What about Pop Culture? And politics? Will we still have a good grasp of slang and the current vernacular? Will we retain a sense of humor, and remain able to give as much sass as we take? If we lapse into writing about age spots, weak bladders, and varicose veins, will the younger generation still read us? From what perspective will we write about sex? Because, I mean, if we have to rely on memory, and the memory goes, what then? Are there any rules about old folks peppering their posts with the occasional 4-letter word? At what age will we be considered old folks? 80? 90? 102?
Some people seem old at 40. Others have a magically youthful mindset at 70. I think that age doesn't mean all that much in the grand scheme of things. It's just a number. Whatever one thinks one can do, one can do. At any age.
But -- can you still be a volcano goddess at 108?
This is a lot to think about for someone who's never sure she'll have anything to blog about next month, or next week, or even tomorrow. And believe me, I will quit before I veer off into gratuitous idiocy with nothing of any substance to say. I don't think that'll happen to any of us, though. We have good heads on us and there's no reason to think we won't stay sharp.
What do you think? What's the oldest age you can still envision yourself blogging?
Talking about old age reminds me of ... Medicare.
The phone rang one day and the lady of the house answered.
"Hello?"
"Mrs. Ward, please."
"Speaking."
"Mrs. Ward, this is Doctor Jones at the Medical Testing Laboratory. When your doctor sent your husband's biopsy to the lab yesterday, a biopsy from another Mr. Ward arrived as well, and we are now uncertain which one is your husband's. Frankly, the results are either bad or terrible."
"What do you mean?" Mrs. Ward asked nervously.
"Well, one of the specimens tested positive for Alzheimer's and the other one tested positive for AIDS. We can't tell which are your husband's."
"That's dreadful! Can't you do the test again?" questioned Mrs. Ward.
"Normally we can, but Medicare will only pay for these expensive tests one time. The people at Medicare recommend that you drop your husband off somewhere in the middle of town. If he finds his way home, don't sleep with him."
One thing we can always count on is a plethora of blasfomys from TWISTED LINGUISTICS.
satetment - Too much sex.
ancestoirs - French relatives.
millin dollar - O, it only sounds like a lot.
callibur
depsoit
thiose
instulation
stero
books on shelfves in barnes and Nobels
curioulsy
vice a versa
18 comments:
Excuse Me...
Gratuitous Idiocy has not stopped me now....Or will stop me in the future from Posting!!!!
Thank You Sherrena. The Lava Queen!
And speaking of old...Some people are still in bed? (/t.)
These are sort of weak today...I'm not hitting on all my mental cylinders.
callibur - seeking a telephone connection with either Perry Mason or Robert Ironside. You'll be on hold for a looooong time.
depsoit - withdrawal.
thiose - the condition of having enormous thighs.
instulation - the protective layer around the brains of stupid people.
stero - a defective record player.
books on shelfves in barnes and Nobels - the section for illiterates.
curioulsy - DVD release of the foreign porn film originally titled
"I Am Curious, Stupid."
vice a versa - description of a confused Italian.
108 is the new 90...
I'll still be blogging then. In fact, I've already got some ideas.
Age is a funny thing. I had a beer with an old co-worker that I hadn't seen in 10 years and the first thing he said to me was "Jesus, don't you ever age? You look exactly the same." He on the other hand had grayed, thinned, and put on weight. I must be like the blogging version of Dick Clark!
callibur: Taco bell slang for a California Burrito.
depsoit Say it three times fast and you'll get the message
thiose: (Panty) hose with a lisp
stero: Cheap knock off Sterno from China
vice a versa: well versed in vices or ipso facto well viced in verses
When I get too old to tango then I'll be using the little blue pill. Unfortunately there won't any time for blogging. He He He.
Like G-Man, I don't think I have said anything more than the gratuitously idiotic.
callibur- the exact size of the spur in your shoe
depsoit- the money laid down for Johnny Depp's soil
thiose- the Loise
instulation- instituting insulation
stero- when one has an Oreo cookie on either side of their head
books on shelfves in barnes and Nobels- something about Elves working in a major book retail chain
curioulsy- the cure for curiosity
vice a versa- the lyrics to a song about vice
You're excused, Galen. Lava Queen say so. Anyway, you know what I mean by gratuitous idiocy. None of us have to worry about that.:)
Well, they ain't all that weak, Bilbo. I think they're pretty good, in fact. I do know some people -- like the ones hanging around those shelfves -- who need their instulation replaced.:-)
I'll bet you will still be blogging at 108, VE. God knows, you have enough ideas. I know what you mean about some people aging faster than others. I've seen people I went to school with who're as gray as, well, my mother. It's very disconcerting.:)
Funny, funny words, NYD. And thank you for using ipso facto! Re the blue pill tango, LMAO! I'll know what's happening when you disappear from blogdom.:)
Kan, my baby, hush now. You do not do the gratuitously idiotic. If you ever do anything idiotic, it's for the same reason I do -- accidental! I'm laughing out loud at your definition of "stero." I can actually see that in my head; worse than an earworm, believe me.:)
I'm not hip NOW! But that hasn't stopped me from blogging. There's an audience for everything.
xx
pinks
Au contraire, Madame Pinks. I think you are très hip.:)
I have thought about this too, Serena! I can't imagine what I'll be blogging about--but I'm 95% sure I'll still be blogging. :)
--snow
Wait. She DIED? Crap. Well, THERE GOES my target demographic. Now what?
I'll bet you will, too, Snow. Of course, you'll still have plenty of material because when you're 108, I'll be about 200.:-)
Whoa, there, Puggy. You just need to divert your focus to the 90-year-old set. I've heard tell they're just as much fun as the 108-year-olds.:)
108!! Imagine sitting in front of a computer in wet or messed Depends, holding a magnifying glass up to the screen, and trying to remember what you typed in the last sentence!!
What age was she when she started blogging - 95?
Imagine the history she had seen and could draw upon to blog about - if she could remember any of it.
All I can hope for is that I'll be able to blog as long as I can still maintain a sense of humor and be able to recognize what is and isn't funny.
BTW Serena, the next episode of "Eddie" has been posted. The story is getting close to an end.....
I think you'll like the pun in the last VT post.
Mike, you're another one who'll never run out of stuff to blog about, magnifying glasses and messy Depends notwithstanding.:-)
Caught your posts; great stuff!
All Hail Sherrena...:-)
They have as much right as any one of us to blog or do anything else they want to do. A study into their thought process ,however , will be so interesting! To know what all goes inside a human mind at that age...
Besides, they HAVE more experience than anyone else! So we ought to respect that! There always might be something they know, which we don't...
& even it is incoherent blabber ( apparently) there must be some deeper sense in that. Sometimes, what appear as madmen to us, are saner than who we consider as wisest...sometimes there is more depth in the apparent jibberish. I know that since James Joyce became famous with his Ulysses and Finneganwakes!
Serena, They say old people become like children. Perhaps it may be because they realize that of all the stages of life, childhood is the best and the wisest part in Human Life, because that is when we are most Natural.
The first childhood is lost because it is a gift, & whatever is given can be taken away. The second childhood, will never be taken away, because it has been earned...
If you sit by an old person & talk to them...you realize how carefree most of them have become ( from what they have to say). Just like children...
We always tend to underestimate children, because of their lack of knowledge, but children know. Its only , they don't know that they know...
Its only the children, who learn out of curiosity, and its only a child's mind that is a 'questioning' mind. So they have the most heightened sense of awareness than man of any age ever has. They learn the most, up to the age of ten, after which ready made bulk of knowledge starts getting dumped on them...
Then they operate like technical automatons...
They tend to become the cabbages. No doubt these cabbages will differ in quality & some will be cabbages above white collar. But cabbages they will be...
Because man tends to follow herds...& rebellion of any kind will be smothered by the majority.
Those who dare to speak against, will be burned at the stakes...or hung at a cross...
Because they would appear incoherent & mad to the herd mentality, because they have appeared much before their time....
Serena, I feel, that the only true rebellion is the rebellion of the self, where each person has to work upon self improvement in a way that is best for him/her. & this is the only way to save the world...one at a time...
No I haven't had a drink too many :) . I only drink water... :D
So Mr. Knowitall, do I get, like, a prize?:-)
Mona, I certainly agree that older people have the life experience to write some delightful stuff. I didn't mean to imply otherwise. I've never read the deceased lady's blog so I don't know what she wrote about, but I suspect it was drawn on her experiences and was insightful and full of wisdom.:)
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