Miss Begotten is one of my pet names for myself, for Southern Gothic reasons best kept to myself. Miss Begotten tries to speak plainly, but sometimes she tends to babble -- parenthetically, of course. It's never my intention to offend (and usually that's true - except on those [maybe not so] rare occasions when I mean it very friggin' much) but it sometimes happens, so if you're unusually easily offended...
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Fun With Twisted Linguistics
If it's Thursday -- and according to my calendar, it is -- there must be blasfomy afoot. Here's today's collection of Words Gone Wild.
inspiratin
suspened
dispicible
respitory infection
jurgement
presumibly
sharp shoters
lossers
sais
obviousely
And now, what to do with them? Well... You know those annoying questions you see on certain tests, like the SATs? That's what we're doing today. We'll call this a BAT -- Blasfomic Aptitude Test. Clear your head and sharpen your pencil. Time starts now.
Soap is to water as inspiratin is to _________.
Love is to sex as suspened is to __________.
Dough is to bread as dispicible is to __________.
Medicine is to doctor as respitory infection is to __________.
Crime is to jail as jurgement is to ____________.
Words are to dictionaries as sharp shoters are to ___________.
Notes are to music as presumibly is to __________.
Zombies are to coffins as lossers are to ___________.
Night is to day as sais is to __________.
Provenance is to counterfeiters as obviousely is to ____________.
Yay! You finished the test. As did I. To which my alleged answers were:
Soap is to water as inspiratin is to MoTown.
Love is to sex as suspened is to S&M.
Dough is to bread as dispicible is to curry.
Pill is to doctor as respitory infection is to armed robbery.
Crime is to law as jurgement is to piracy.
Words are to dictionaries as sharp shoters are to thugs.
Notes are to music as presumibly is to rap.
Zombies are to coffins as lossers are to proms.
Night is to day as sais is to getting grounded.
Provenance is to counterfeiters as obviousely is to usury.
You are absolved of your blasfomy. Go, now, and get your "Smart badge" -- and be sure to tell us what yours says.
Happy Thursday!
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8 comments:
Last night's speech was full of blasfomy, but I'll stick to h'yar:
perspiration
upended
dildough
Skank Girl
congruss
barlight beauty pageants
assumptiveality
crotch crickets
dois
retrofitters
I don't understand any of these words Sherry....
I guess I'm just a lossers!!
Soap is to water as inspiratin is to _________headache.
Love is to sex as suspened is to __________depend.
Dough is to bread as dispicible is to __________seafood.
Medicine is to doctor as respitory infection is to __________mouth.
Crime is to jail as jurgement is to ____________purgement.
Words are to dictionaries as sharp shoters are to ___________dictation.
Notes are to music as presumibly is to __________maths.
Zombies are to coffins as lossers are to ___________stock markets.
Night is to day as sais is to __________dais.
Provenance is to counterfeiters as obviousely is to ____________abusers.
LOL, Skunk. I think Skank Girl would be a sure-fire winner of the Barlight Beauty Pageant. Just don't let her see the dildough; she'd take it all.:)
NObody understands them, Galen. That's why we eviscerate them. Doesn't make us lossers. Makes us -- Word Warriors.:-)
Good job, Mona, on a hard test.:)
Um, nobody's gone and gotten their "Smart" badge yet. How come?;)
Soap is to water as inspiratin is to K-Y Jelly.
Love is to sex as suspened is to anything where suspened is considered optional.
Dough is to bread as dispicible is to current Republicans.
Medicine is to doctor as respitory infection is to coworkers seeking any excuse not to show up.
Crime is to jail as jurgement is to marriage.
Words are to dictionaries as sharp shoters are to Dealey Plaza.
Notes are to music as presumibly is to morons' assessments of Obama's presidency.
Zombies are to coffins as lossers are to Palin rallies.
Night is to day as sais is to blessed silence.
Provenance is to counterfeiters as obviousely is to that creepy guy in the park wearing a trenchcoat and approaching the Ladies' Auxiliary.
I give you an A+ on your BATs, Pugsley, though why cute, innocent little pugs would know anything about KY Jelly is beyond me. They won't let me in the Ladies' Auxiliary, but I did see the creepy guy in the trench coat. Trust me, there was nothing to write home about.;)
Happy friday to my socially smart pal! :)
--snow
Happy Friday to you, too, Miss Snow.:)
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