Tuesday, August 25, 2009
I've been shopping for a nice selection of greeting cards for Skank Girl. I don't think I've mentioned to you guys what the occasion is. I got a raise the first of the month. It was only $1.00 an hour, but every little bit helps and I was glad to get it. I just found out last week that by whatever hook or crook, Skank Girl managed to get herself a raise of FOUR dollars an hour, so that she now makes the same rate I do. And she earns this for having no legal knowledge whatsoever, doing as little as she can get by with, and stealing from the boss. She did it (stole) again recently and Baby Lawyer and I know it, but the boss is protecting her for some unholy reason.
All of this, and so much more, is why I've declared war and open season on the ho. So, I'm looking to buy her cards to express my sentiments but not finding what I want commercially. As much as I admire and respect Hallmark, they're not going to be able to help me out here. Therefore, it looks like I'm going to have to make my own. And what I need from you guys today is a little help. I'm wide open to suggestions about what the cover picture should be, what would be an appropriate inside message and, if it's a sound card, whose voice and/or music would be most irritating. I'm not much of a graphic artist, but I think I can render whatever you all come up with. And Skank Girl will love it! And if there are words of more than two syllables, she won't have any idea whether she loves it or not. And ... if your card provides the impetus for her to haul butt, I will be in your debt forever!