Tuesday, December 18, 2007
= Michael Jackson showed up at a Las Vegas Barnes & Noble recently wearing shades and a quasi-veil over a bunch of fresh bandages on his face. Those who caught a glimpse say his face looked like it was disintegrating. What do you suppose is going on this time? More importantly, do you care?
= On December 14th, Pam Anderson filed divorce papers against her husband of two months, Rick Solomon -- best known for co-starring in Paris Hilton's sex tape. Tee-hee. Sources say, however, that they reconciled and were subsequently seen out together. Boo-freakin-hoo.
= Celine Dion has taken her final (tearful) bow in Vegas, ending a 5-year mega-bucks run.
= Despite the writers' strike, now in its second month, Jay Leno and Conan O'Brien are returning to late night TV with new shows, sans writers, on January 2. I've missed them and am loathing reruns, but I'm not sure how I feel about this development.
I know how I feel about this -- the TWISTED LINGUISTICS Inquisition of Words Gone Wild. I feel a bloodletting coming on.
in a more timely and efficient manor - Setting up housekeeping in a double-wide with low monthly payments.
allienate - Territory of disenfranchised alligator babies.
apolegies - Geez, he just had an apoplexy.
tecanicaly - I'm not sure, but I do know this is not your father's technology.
innapropriate - An acceptable motel.
conceret - A really low-brow concert.
aprriciate - Officiating at April events.
awasome - Even more enticing than winsome.
lip sych - Making weird lip movements to gross out and scare off perverts.
If it's Tuesday, then it's time to Pimp Some Poetry and Vamp me some Verses. Today I'd like rhyming verses on "All I Want for Christmas Is..."
I'll even go first.
Santa baby, what would it take
To get an original, never a fake?
Forget the presents stacked in piles,
All I want for Christmas is a box of smiles!