Monday, July 02, 2007

Toofies and Fairies and Rubies, Oh My

I had a toothache yesterday. I'm a big girl; I can take it. Anbesol worked pretty well on it, although I know that's only a stopgap, symptom-masking measure. It doesn't hurt any more, but if it starts hurting again I may have to break down and {{shudders and horrors}} go to the dentist. If the tooth ultimately has to come out, I have only one question: Am I too old for the Tooth Fairy to pay me a visit?

Which Tooth Fairy do you suppose I would draw (because I know there must be more than one to service all the missing teeth in the world)? Would I get a girl fairy or a boy fairy? I guess either one is going to show up in frothy tulle and pink tights, huh? Okay, so I guess it won't make any difference. I would like to state for the record, however, that I'd prefer to see a five o'clock shadow on my surreptitious nocturnal visitors.

Next question: How much can I get? What is the going rate for stray teeth these days? I'd get substantially more than a 6-year-old, right? If the money is good enough, I could possibly be enticed to donate more than one tooth. I just hope I get enough to pay for a replacement tooth if worse comes to worst. Just in case...

Today, the issue is moot, but if it starts hurting again, I will surely have to address these burning questions.

May I please note that while the recent Blogger problems went away, I am freakin' sick and tired of having to continually sign in?! Why can't the stupid thing Remember Me like it's supposed to?

We have a bumper crop of Words Gone Wild today. The hell with trials -- TWISTED LINGUISTICS is summarily convicting them all. Some of these, I was able to define; the rest made my brain hurt too much.

stire the pot - Yes, do stire that thing. Anybody know what stire means?

Diplomay if the art of thinking twice - Yes, I'm sure it is. What?!

visa-versa - Reversing the charges on your credit card.

misiformation - When all the young, unmarried ladies line up and prepare to march.

persue - According to Susan.

He had an sorted life - I'll bet he was a dirty old man and it was sort of sordid, too.

critizing - When an animal slaps you with a zinger.


raoyalty - Princess in a rayon dress.

costs he will be libel for

From our "editor" person: perdicament

Rounded up by Roxan:

we are beautifully horrably made
contravercy in love
make millions in working 10 seconds a day in my underware
i will addmit i was skeptical
almost give away my mounth salary

Do you love them?! Aren't you simply itching to dissect them? It would be so horrably exellent, regaurdless of the contravercy. Put on your underware and give it 10 seconds.

Your Gemstone is Ruby

Daring, enthusiastic, and spontaneous.
You are energetic and passionate, with an appetite for life.


Kanrei said...

Where did you get that photo?! They promised me the copies were destroyed!!! Oh, I feel so betrayed.

What is that "dentist" word you speak of? It sound horrid. I go through great pains to avoid pain so that "d" word I do not know. Sounds really painful though.

Sorry about the tooth. I think it is worth a diamond so talk to the Huzz.

Serena Joy said...

Oops! I forgot you told me to never show that picture to anyone. You have to admit it's pretty cute, though.:-)

The tooth hasn't bothered me a bit today, but what is this Huzz with diamonds you speak of? And where can I get one? Then again, if it's what I think it is, I'd rather have a puppy.:)

Roxan said...

***Your Gemstone is Topaz***

Comforting, considerate, and stable.
You are down to earth and grounded.

My kids never understood my panic over the dentist. They never had to endure the Marque De Sade of teeth we all remember from our childhood. LOL

Serena Joy said...

It's funny how no matter how much the technology (and pain control!) has improved, the inherent fear is still there.

Topaz is pretty.

Kanrei said...

Just for you

I love this song

ThatGreenyFlower said...

Amber? AMBER? Well, hell, that's not even a frickin' GEMstone!

Amber. Sheeit.

Serena Joy said...

I love it, Kan! Thank you, dahling. I would like some of your drugs, please.:-) I swear, I can't quit laughing. It's a good thing my tooth doesn't hurt.

Greeny, honey, amber is so PRETTY! And you do remember 'Forever Amber'? That chick was no slacker in the gorgeous and fun department.:)

Seeley deBorn said...

Like the lovely green flower, I am petrefied tree sap.

"Creative, happy, and logical.
You shine in any intellectual endeavor"

I do like the look of it though, especially the green stuff. And raking it from the Baltic is on my list of things to do....

Seeley deBorn said...

Oh, and I think I left you a twisted linguistic in my reply to your comment on my blog.

Serena Joy said...

Raking green stuff from the Baltic every chance you get sounds like fun, Seeley.:-) Amber = pretty. If a third one of you Amber Girls turns up, you could start a group and give the Pussycat Dolls a run for their money. We'll have to think of an uber cool name for it.:)

I saw your Twisted Linguistic, but not to worry, the posse only picks up criminal words in the Badlands.

Top cat said...

I hate to shake your belief system but the tooth fairy lies within you.
If you can get in touch with it you still won't get any prize money but what you will gain during the journey is well worth it grasshopper.

Serena Joy said...

TC, are you talking about that chick in there that I have to beat back with a stick during full moons? The diva in stilettos and sequins? If she's in charge of my tooth money, I am stuck royally up the creek because she's dirt poor. That just ain't gonna fly. If I have to give up a tooth, I want the big bucks from a real live Tooth Fairy for it. It costs money to feed Grasshopper, you know.:-)

G-Man said...

Serena...I'm an Emerald!
I am balanced, and I bring luck to any situation!
What a crock of shit!!
Your tooth? Priceless!

Serena Joy said...

G, I'll trade you my icky tooth for the emerald. That's my birthstone. What is this crock of shit of which you speak? You are, too, balanced and lucky.:)

Corn Dog said...

***Your Gemstone is Underware***

These quizes are amazingly accurate.

Serena Joy said...

LOL, Corn Dog! Good God, the quizzes have been infected, haven't they? Or maybe they've been in the corn liquor. I hope they're at least wearing clean underware.:-)

Trée said...

S, I'm not having any of these blogger problems. Perhaps you need to bring your equipment over here and let me look under the hood. Oh, and wear that yellow sweater you had on the other day.

Serena Joy said...

Okey-dokey. If yellow will ward off the Blogger evil, I'll be right there.:)

Trée said...

Oh, yellow will do much more than that. So hurry, quickly. I might even have a little something to put under your pillow.

tfg said...

This kind of reminds me of the time I sold my spleen on E-bay.

Serena Joy said...

Tre'e, I don't have to give up a tooth for what you put under the pillow, right?

T, in light of my newfound interest in the price of body parts, you know I have to know how much you got for it.:-)

Charles said...

Sounds a lot like a manogram. I guess that would make you like a Pokemon character, Nurse Joy.

Serena Joy said...

LOL, Charles. I wouldn't mind playing Nurse, but I can't do the manograms. Or anything involving blood. I'm squeamish. Maybe I should work the Psych ward.:-)

Jack K. said...

stire = tired sire?

Serena Joy said...

I think that just might be it, Jack. Or ... a tired steer, perhaps.:-)

Liz said...

Blogger won't remember me either! And I've tried setting all sorts of cookie stuff. I can't work it out.

Liz said...

I am an orange saphire. I thought sapphires were blue. I'm not even a real gem!