Friday, August 04, 2006

Out of the News

There's been a lot of heavy stuff in the news the past couple of days. First and foremost is the Middle East situation. There's no letup in the Israel-Lebanon conflict. The entire Middle East is a powder keg if you ask me; very scary stuff.

Mel Gibson's drunken rant left a lot of heads shaking and tongues wagging. That's one of those things that just leaves you wondering, "What was he thinking?" Perhaps the problem is that he wasn't thinking. Then again, they do say that in vino veritas, and it ain't pretty.

Two suspects were arrested in one of Phoenix, Arizona's, dual serial killing cases today. If they're the right suspects, I'm sure there's a lot of relief in the Phoenix area tonight. Now, they need to round up the other guy, who's just as lethal.

And then we have poor Barney, the Doberman in the doghouse (or would that be the Heartbreak Hotel?) for a spree through a teddy bear display in Somerset, England. Barney mutilated, slobbered on, disemboweled, and committed general mayhem on most of the valuable teddy bears on exhibit. Barney, Barney -- you ain't nothin' but a hound dog. Perhaps his greatest sin was the dismemberment of Mabel, Elvis Presley's own teddy bear. By the time Barney was run to ground, there was apparently little left of the bears but scattered stuffing, rolling glass eyes, and a hodge-podge of severed limbs. Barney was the guard dog at the museum. I daresay it's safe to say this doggie's guard-dogging days are over. Barney was a bad boy, but I can't help but smile when I see the total hang-dog look on his face. Poor puppy knows he's been a bad boy.

A few Words Gone Wild have been rounded up recently. The charges run the usual gamut -- everything from felonious impersonation of writing to forgery and uttering of bogus words.

Cleared a lot of hurtles -- I suspect this alludes to injured turtles, but I'm not certain.

Invite her hear -- Here, here!

Sponsered by -- Sponges deliberately dried out and allowed to wither by this person. I don't know what happens to them after that. I'm afraid to ask.

Tradional -- I think this is one of those obscure terms tossed about by people who actually get Geometry.

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