Maybe "jam" is a bit of a stretch here. Maybe it's funny. Maybe it's absurd. Maybe it just is ... what it is. Maybe you should be the judge.
So anyway, what are you guys doing today? You know, I wouldn't mind a bit if you find yourselves suddenly inspired to write me some fowl limericks.
Go, now, and enjoy a Satisfyingly Serene Saturday.
Miss Begotten is one of my pet names for myself, for Southern Gothic reasons best kept to myself. Miss Begotten tries to speak plainly, but sometimes she tends to babble -- parenthetically, of course. It's never my intention to offend (and usually that's true - except on those [maybe not so] rare occasions when I mean it very friggin' much) but it sometimes happens, so if you're unusually easily offended...
18 comments:
There once was a discontented duck
Who just didn’t seem to give a f**k
His feathers plucked clean
For sleeping bags gone ‘green’
Meant even the winters did s**k
There was a man named Ferd
Whose car was covered with turd
he shouted at the fowl
as he wiped it with a towel
and flipped the pigeons the bird
Yesss!! You two are getting my day off to a great start, VE and Roxan. Rockin' good limericks! Keep 'em coming.:-)
There once was a brash poulet,
Whose feathers were showy and gay,
'Til she ran out of luck
And spouted the wrong muck.
Now she's a chick fillet.
there once was a man from kent
who lived in a coop with a bunch of chickens on whose care and feeding his entire income was spent
his wife said, "strange..."
and, "something must change!"
so he gave her up for lent!
HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND SERENA STRANGE!
<3
LOL, /t. Thanks for making me laugh. Serena Strange -- yeah, I'll take that.:D
Although, it may not be jam,
its certainly not jelly.
When cooked hotter than ham,
bird meat is good in the belly.
LOL, Charles. Whether baked, breaded, roasted, fried, boiled, broiled, broasted, grilled, or stir-fried, bird meat does indeed feel good to an empty belly. Bwaaaak.:-)
The chicken or the egg, which came first, which comes next?
Well, according to some new scientific text,
And bones and runes, voodoo formulae and DNA,
Here's what the latest findings say:
The lowly chicken descended from Tyrannosaurus rex.
Chickens squawk and chickens dance,
Chickens never want to wear any pants,
If lips they have, then lips they flap,
Clucking about all their chicken crap.
Just begging for a grill on the end of a lance.
There was once a fowl from Flint
Who fell in love with a fly called Peppermint
Said the fowl to fly lets flee
Or your kind will cry foul to thee
If of fly falling for fowl they get a hint.
Here Serena... This is the best my sleep depraved brain could manage for right now...I guess its an attempt at rhyming though..
There once was a duck from Nantucket,
who flew 'round the world in a bucket;
after an orbit or two,
he hadn't a clue,
so for once more around he said f**k it...
Thanks for two more great additions to the weekend limerick collection, Mona and Skunk. Funny stuff. LOL!:-)
There once was a turkey named Martin
Whose poor back was always a-smartin.'
His breast was enormous,
So the farmer informed us
His name had now been changed to Parton.
ROTFL! That's a terrific limerick, Bilbo. Thanks.:)
Just how is it one can goad
A chicken to cross the road?
If those fowls are males
You see, it never fails
When hens' breasts are showed.
So, that's an issue in the world of poultry dating, too, Mike? LOL. When it's nicely roasted and sliced and slapped on a bun with some mayo, I don't care whether it's male or female. Fowl's fowl. Yum-yum:-)
An oversexed rooster named named Larry..
Would fuck so much it was scary..
He bragged.."I've banged All types of fowl..
..An occassional Owl.
And a slow moving Ostrich named Gary"!!
Sorry I'm late Serena, but this week-end was kind of CRAZY!!
Have a great week at work...G
xoxbgxoxo
LOL, G. Ol' Larry gets around -- and he's not real discriminating, either. Bwaaaak.:-)
I know, it has been a crazy-busy weekend all around.
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