Tuesday, January 01, 2008

An '08 Fête

Okay, so it's no big to-do and not precisely a fête. But it (as a title) sounded good.

I said I wouldn't do it, but it's a woman's prerogative to change her mind; et voila, I made New Year's Resolutions.

1. If it doesn't run from me, I will eat it.
2. I won't press my luck and break any bad habits. Why mess up a good thing?
3. 4 is a good number. It's been 4 years since that embarrassing book thing. 4 + 4 is 8, and it's now 2008. Yeah, it's time that I get busy again.
4. I'm not getting any younger, so I might as well try developing a taste for tequila shots now.
5. I will resolve to eat more flavors of ice cream -- and I won't skimp on the toppings.
6. I will try informing the dog one more time that I'm the Alpha female around here and, as such, am entitled to the majority of the bed space, more covers, the entire driver's seat in my car, the right to eat a plate of food without being guilted out of it by begging eyes, and deserve at least 1/4 of the couch.
7. I will be kind to assholes. Not!
8. I will start acting more my age -- someday; not this year.
9. I will stop making frivolous purchases, just like I'll start paying more attention to my U.S. mail than I do to my e-mail. Mmm-hmm.
10. I will give up chocolate -- along with water, air, coffee, food, Zantac, my computer, my car, and e-mail.

I guess they aren't so much resolutions as little daily reminders I'm pretty sure I can snort over remember.

I hope you had a wonderful New Year's Eve and are enjoying some down time today.

Since it's not only New Year's Day but also Tuesday and, perforce, Pimp Me Some Poetry Day, I'd like rhyming verses, please, on -- New Year's Resolutions. Let's just run the subject into the ground and have done with it once and for all, why don't we?

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G-Man said...

I hade a glimmer of hope there for a minute on #7.

Serena Joy said...

Nah, Galen. You know me well enough to know that ain't gonna happen. Not in this lifetime.:-)

G-Man said...

I hope you got a kiss at Midnight to usher in the New Year?????

Serena Joy said...

Ladies never kiss and tell -- but I hope you got one as well.:)

Happy New Year, Galen.

Palm Springs Savant said...

good luck with the dog...I'm sure it will work. yeah riiiiiiight.


(from one dog lover to another)

happy new year!

snowelf said...

Yea. Me too. All of 'em. ;)

Happy New Year!! :)


Hale McKay said...

I Hereby Resolve

Listen my friends and you shall hear
Of my midnight party to spread good cheer.
It was December 31,'07, and oh so late
As I planned my toast to ring in '08,
To wish all everywhere a Happy New Year.

And ere the clock had reached midnight
The spread of appetizers caught my sight;
But I stumbled spilling the whole bunch
And every step I made was met with a crunch.
So I knelt down and ate some just for spite.

So then I crawled, to walk I was unable
And wiped my mouth on someone's sable.
Music was playing so I took a big chance
At that very moment to jump up and dance,
But I forgot I was still under the table.

With hangover, now it all seems like a dream,
Everyone turned when they heard her scream.
It was time to kiss, but here's a kicker,
When she puckered I started to lick her
Coz I thought her makeup was whipped cream.

So now I must make a New Year's resolution
So that I never again need any absolution;
I will never take bacchanalian action
At a party that might leave me in traction.
So, when will I be released from the institution?

Hale McKay said...

Hmmm .... I think that last one belongs on the poetry site!

ThatGreenyFlower said...

A woman who lived in the South
Resolved, "No more foot in my mouth!"
So she gathered up fluff,
Her mouth for to stuff,
And said, "Can't thay anything nowth!"

Serena Joy said...

Thanks, Rick. I knew you'd get it about the dog. Happy New Year to you!:)

Oh, goodie, Snow -- you can help me keep my resolutions. LOL! Happy New Year to you!:)

Mike, I am LMAO. What a terrific poem! You bet it'll be going over to PT. Happy New Year to you!:)

Greeny, the Limerick Queen, you also make me LMAO. Happy New Year to you, sweetie!:)

Laurie said...

Happy New Year!!!! You won't be sorry about the tequila shots. Start out with Patron...slowly.

Serena Joy said...

I'm gonna give it a shot, Laurie, and slooooooow is the word. Happy New Year!:)

Charles said...

New Year's resolutions, one or two or three.
New Year's resolutions, stay away from me.
Too heavy is your weight.
Your burden of responsibility is just too great.
My little habits I'll adjust, if I don't wait too late.
Besides I sometimes benefit, if I procrastinate.

Little Lamb said...

I didn't make any resolutions, new year or not.

Little Wing said...

Oh Serena, those were great!
My kind of resolutions!

Serena Joy said...

Ah, yes, Charles -- I think there is tremendous benefit in procrastination. Good job! Happy New Year to you.:)

I don't blame you, Lambiekins. I didn't make any real ones, either. Happy New Year!:)

Thanks, Little Wing, and Happy New Year to you.:)

Corn Dog said...

Happy New Year, SJ!

Anonymous said...

Haha on the tequila shots. The first one is the worst. Just remember to have a lime or some citrus fruit at the ready. After the second shot, you'll be surprised how the taste doesn't matter any more. LOL!


Serena Joy said...

Happy New Year back atcha, Corn Doggie.:)

Oh, Luuuuuuucy, is that you? I still have a couple of bottles of Fat Mama's Knock You Nekkid. It's not shots, but wanna share?:)
Love, Ethel

Anonymous said...

It is none other than moi, Ethel. I'm trying to make a come back and Knock You Nekkid should give me the boost I need. I'll get the glasses, you grab the bottle and we'll meet on the deck by the fire ring.

Lub you too, Ethel

Serena Joy said...

Well, damn, Lucy, it's about time you made a come-back! I've missed my main sidekick. I was beginning to think Ricky had locked you in the cellar and Fred lost the key.

Yup, get the fire ring going and I'll grab the bottle.:)
Love, Ethel