Tuesday, September 04, 2007

Tuesday, And Most If Not All Is Well


I was thinking about doing Charles's Viral Story Tag today, because I was thinking it would save me from having to write a post. Then I started thinking about how much energy I didn't have that it would take to make all the links and yada-yada. And then I thought, "Nah. I'll think about that tomorrow. Or the next day."

And so I decided that what I will talk about today is -- people who finish other peoples' sentences. Is there someone you're so simpatico with that you and he or she often tend to finish each other's sentences? Out loud, yet? My sister and I do it with each other, and I'm in tune enough with a couple of very good friends that we also do it. What does that mean? Something? Anything? Nothing?

Let's experiment a little and see how we'd complete these sentences.

1. Many paths lead to the same _______.
2. All roads lead to _______.
3. Don't look to me for tea and ________.
4. If it fails, you have no one to blame but _______.
5. It's late, I'm tired, and I'm going to ________.
6. Tell that to me one more time and I'll ________.
7. I'll think about it ________.
8. When all else fails, _______.
9. Life is a journey to _______.
10. Nothin' says lovin' like ________.
11. Britney Spears, queen of the ________.

I'd also like (because of some strange and ominous rumblings) to say a word or two about PublishAmerica today. Again. But I'm not going to. The only thing I want to do with PA is dance in the embers when it goes down in flames. If you know nothing about that sham publisher, you're better off. It's not my job to coax folks into experimenting with a different flavor Kool-Aid or swallowing an alternative dogma. People are going to do whatever they're going to do. All I'll say is that if you're a writer with a saleable manuscript in your hands, do your research before choosing publishers to submit to and avoid PublishAmerica like the plague. Trust me, a simple Google search will tell you everything you need to know.

TWISTED LINGUISTICS has Words Gone Wild today and, guess what, some of them come straight from PA-land. See what you can do with the ones I missed.

20 $

prived

his writing jernery

showen

bronchial pheumina - Condition whereby the lungs are sucked up through the nasal passages and blown out the nose while sneezing.

messwage board - Forums frequented by sloppy masseuses who are paid by the hour.

These WGWs come from our infamous "editor" person who is, ta-da, a moderator on a pro-PA board.

hamspers - A cross between small furry rodents and pigs.

huge fat wriggling insents

warrent

You Are a Mai Tai

You aren't a big drinker, but you'll drink if the atmosphere is festive.
And when you're drunk, watch out! You're easily carried away.

32 comments:

G-Man said...

1.Outhouse
2.The Pentagon(a D.C. Joke)
3.Brie
4.Serena Joy
5.Do it just once
6.Finally get it
7....NOT!
8.Forgetaboutit!
9.Herpes
10.Bald and Nasty Cooter

Hey this was fun, I had more laughs than a barrel of....

Serena said...

LMAO, G. Re your #4, hmph, take a number. #5 appears to be universally ubiquitous.:-) Um, one would hope that your answer #10 actually goes to #11. Otherwise, eeee-yewwwww!:)

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

1. Many paths lead to the same aparatus.
2. All roads lead to the same aparatus.
3. Don't look to me for tea and crumpet aparatus.
4. If it fails, you have no one to blame but the aparatus.
5. It's late, I'm tired, and I'm going to sleep with the aparatus.
6. Tell that to me one more time and I'll turn on the cone of silence aparatus.
7. I'll think about it with my deep thoughts aparatus.
8. When all else fails, blame the nearest aparatus.
9. Life is a journey to the great aparatus.
10. Nothin' says lovin' like oily aparatus.
11. Britney Spears, queen of the gargoyles.

btw, i didn't make any extra summer cash at that website...

/t.

Unknown said...

his writing jernery- I am not sure, but I know Jernery spoke in class today

prived- the privilege of owning a Toyota Prius



1. Many paths lead to the same group of lost people.
2. All roads lead to someplace really close to where you wanted to be.
3. Don't look to me for tea and directions, I'm still lost from question one.
4. If it fails, you have no one to blame but the person who gave me directions from question one.
5. It's late, I'm tired, and I'm going to remain lost for a while longer.
6. Tell that to me one more time and I'll do nothing...I'm still lost.
7. I'll think about it while I am lost. I have nothing else to do.
8. When all else fails, there is nothing left; all else has already failed.
9. Life is a journey to wander about while lost from question one.
10. Nothin' says lovin' like a search party.
11. Britney Spears, queen of the found. Why do you think so many of us are remaining lost?

Yea...

Queenie said...

Didn't put mine down, everyone else is so much funnier than --

Camille Alexa said...

1. Many paths lead to the same shopping mall -- who designed this parking lot anyway?

2. All roads lead to the same goddam mall!!! Am I in a Twilight Zone episode or something? Get me out of here. I hate malls.

3. Don't look to me for tea and the expensive kind of cookies because I ate those before you got here and all I've got left are those cheapie ones; sorry.

4. If it fails, you have no one to blame but that guy over there, because I didn't do it whatever it was. No, not that guy, the other one in the baseball cap--yeah, him.

5. It's late, I'm tired, and I'm going to stay up all night anyway, doing useless crap like rereading novels and watching b-movies in the basement and eating leftover party junkfood because I've got no self-discipline whatsoever. None.

6. Tell that to me one more time and I'll do that thing I do when you're repeating yourself but I'm trying to be nice: you know, that thing, where my eyes glaze over a bit but I'm nodding and smiling so it seems like I'm paying attention to what you're saying, though we both know I'm just pretending.

7. I'll think about it when I figure out exactly what it is and why I need to take care of it just now.

8. When all else fails, go shopping, just not at that freakin' mall! Go to the record store, or the book store, or the liquor store or the bakery, but stay away from that pit of hell. For serious!

9. Life is a journey to...wait; did you bring me to the mall??? ARGHH.

10. Nothin' says lovin' like a man who always, without question or fail, cleans up dog vomit, just because he loves you. Flowers and wine and chocolate are all nice (and I get plenty of those), but please, please don't ever stop cleaning up the dog vomit. Love you, S.

11. Britney Spears, queen of the ________.*

*I boycott this last. You KNOW how I feel about fluff media, and yet you torture me. You and Kanrei.

Unknown said...

Birdie,
If it makes you feel better, she tortures me as well. Beware the red crayon.

My stupid Pearl Jam joke has backfired on me. That song has been stuck in my head since I posted it.

clearly I remember picking on the boy/ seemed a harmless little.../Jernery spoke in class today

rkfinnell said...

1. Many paths lead to the same tavern, bar, pub.
2. All roads lead to somewhere else.
3. Don't look to me for tea and crumpets.
4. If it fails, you have no one to blame but the guy next to you.
5. It's late, I'm tired, and I'm going to kill me something.
6. Tell that to me one more time and I'll pretend like I didn't hear you and make you repeat it again.
7. I'll think about it when I feel like it and I won't.
8. When all else fails, lie like a dog.
9. Life is a journey to find out why the hell you are alive in the first place.
10. Nothin' says lovin' like buying me stuff.
11. Britney Spears, queen of the twats.

Charles said...

1. Many paths lead to the same doom.
2. All roads lead to stop signs.
3. Don't look to me for tea and A.
4. If it fails, you have no one to blame but Beelzebub.
5. It's late, I'm tired, and I'm going to kick your butt.
6. Tell that to me one more time and I'll forget it, again.
7. I'll think about it when Hell freezes over.
8. When all else fails, it wasn't worth it.
9. Life is a journey to death.
10. Nothin' says lovin' like Nothin'.
11. Britney Spears, queen of the Trailer Park.

You Are a Bloody Mary
You're a fairly serious drinker, who's experimented a lot with different drinks.
You're a drunk, but a stable drunk. You don't ever let your drinking get out of control.
Funny I didn't answer 3 of them, 2, 5, and 6.

PA, are they a scam? I'll stay away, because I'm not so stupid as to go against obviously good advice.

Serena said...

/t., you seem to have a theme going on. Any particular aparatus giving you Tuesday trouble? LOL. I won't be making any fistfuls of extra summer cash, either; el spammo went zappo.:)

Kan, good definitions and good answers. I DID pick up on "Jeremy." God, I love that song. Um, are you perchance directionally challenged today? You seem to have a theme going on, too.:)

Oh, Queenie, Queenie -- I have no doubt that you'd ace any answers you give.:)

Camille, I dare not suggest to you an outing to the mall today. LOL. Your #4 is spot on. It's always the SODI, only now it's the SODIABCDI (some other dude in a baseball cap did it). #10 -- yes! Show me a man who'll clean up dog puke and I'll show you a man a good woman will love forever.:)

Kan, darling, quit complaining. It's not nice to tell folks your good natured, benevolent owner pokes you with red crayons and tortures you. Yeah boy and hallibalu-ya, you don't even want to think about your penance now.:)

#5, Roxan? Feeling a little testy today, are we? Your #11 is right on the money. LOL.:)

Serena said...

My own answers:

1. Many paths lead to the same door.

2. All roads lead to the end.

3. Don't look to me for tea and crocodile tears.

4. If it fails, you have no one to blame but yourself and the Albanian Navy.

5. It's late, I'm tired, and I'm going to log off and go to sleep.

6. Tell that to me one more time and I'll slap you.

7. I'll think about it tomorrow. Maybe.

8. When all else fails, run like hell.

9. Life is a journey to death.

10. Nothin' says lovin' like comfort food cooked by someone else.

11. Britney Spears, queen of the White Trash Tribe.

rkfinnell said...

Being naughty yesterday did me no good, so I'm back to being my old testy, bitchy self. LOL

Serena said...

Charles, do you and Roxan need to exchange phone numbers and discuss your feelings about #5? Love your answer to #7, and you and I were telepathically connecting on #9.:)

Yes, absolutely, PA is nothing BUT a scam. It's a back-door vanity press that doesn't do a damn thing to promote its own authors. Stay WELL away.

Serena said...

Roxan, you were naughty yesterday? Details! I'm all ears.:-)

rkfinnell said...

Oh? So you haven't even looked at my blog. Geez. LOL

Serena said...

I'm just getting in and taking a look at my own. Haven't had a chance to visit everyone else yet, but I WILL. So, you're saying the salacious details are over there?:-)

Anonymous said...

1. Many paths lead to the same waters, the ones we swim in at night, when we dream.

2. All roads lead to that moment when I first heard her speak. 


3. Don't look to me for tea and sympathy, I’ve had enough of you and your flying saucer logic!

4. If it fails, you have no one to blame-- we’re just floating in space.

5. It's late, I'm tired, and I'm going to get the robot to take the dog for a walk and just retire to the sleep pod, okay?

6. Tell that to me one more time and I’ll get a tattoo. I’ll take you dancing until dawn and then breakfast and coffee at the greasy spoon, construction workers watching us over their newspapers.

7. I'll think about it, I’ll keep it with me. 


8. When all else fails, have a long, hot shower.

9. Life is a journey to the center of the heart.

10. Nothin' says lovin' like that beautiful kiss Al Gore planted on Tipper. Lordy, bring me some water! Hot, Hot, Hot!!


11. Britney Spears, queen of the cautionary tale.

Ed & Jeanne said...

1. Thing...death!
2. High maintence costs for taxpayers
3. A
4. Bush
5. Still at flippin' work!
6. Continue to look at you stupidly as if I don't understand
7. ...Oh, sorry, too late. You missed my thinking window by 20 seconds.
8. Just demand a "do over"
9. End in death just before you start to figure it out
10. When the force is with you...you can feel the...nevermind.
11. Bad Hair Days

Serena said...

Anonymous, you are a poetic soul with a philosophical streak. I love your beautiful answers. 'Twas an arduous task indeed to embue #11 with such a lovely answer. Kudos!:)

VE, your answers gave me guffaws -- as I knew they would. #11 is dead-on true.:-)

Charles said...

Nah. Its just a way to get the crap out of the psyche, and makes sleeping easier sometimes (especially if you catch that uppercut to the jaw.)

Lee said...

1. Many paths lead to the same _baths______.
2. All roads lead to Rhodes_______.
3. Don't look to me for tea and __brie______.
4. If it fails, you have no one to blame but _details______.
5. It's late, I'm tired, and I'm going to _be uninspired_______.
6. Tell that to me one more time and I'll _turn to crime_______.
7. I'll think about it __to wit______.
8. When all else fails, don't turn to the Prince of Wales_______.
9. Life is a journey to _strife______.
10. Nothin' says lovin' like _a hot oven_______.
11. Britney Spears, queen of the "wet-behind-the ears".

Serena said...

What is this undercut thing, Charles? I hit some kid in the jaw once and darn near broke my hand. Didn't faze him.:-)

LOL at your #6, Lee. Your #11 is great, too.:)

Charles said...

UPPERcut. Its a strike from beneath the chin, with the arm mostly bent, so you get the mass of the forearm moving with the shorter length of the humorous giving more force, applied to what is called "the button." The button being the depression found behind the chin, but in front of the mandibular joint. It should jolt the head enough to 'slosh' the brain and cause unconsciousness.

Charles said...

BTW, I liked Lee's rhyming answers.

Little Lamb said...

1 - place
2 - nowhere
3 – sympathy
4 – someone else
5 – sleep
6 – laugh
7 – never
8 – blame someone else
9 – adventure
10 –you
11 - yuck

How'd I do?

Serena said...

Oops, Charles. Upper. Just goes to show how much I know about these things. I admire Lee's rhyming answers, too, and I apologize that I was so tired that I failed to say so.

You did very well, Lamby. Love the Lamby spirit behind #s 4, 6, 7, and 9. And boy did you hit the nail on the head with #11.:)

Charles said...

Sorry SJ, it just that I hate undercuts, since that's how a lot of people who shouldn't, get ahead.

puerileuwaite said...

1. foot (usually still alive and not severed)

2. Walmart, so get used to it

3. friggin' "a", cuz I don't swing that way

4. rubber band and popsickle stick manufacturers

5. going to finish one last beer and land this honkin' planeload of passengers

6. tell you to do me one more time, and not in the cutesy, saccharine "Captain and Tennille" way, either

7. when I have all of that "prison free time" and I get bored with the sex

8. "W"'s work here will be done

9. spawn and then get consumed by a grizzly

10. a dressmaker's dummy, and a good hotel porno they forget to add to your bill

11. women who REALLY let themselves rapidly go - both physically AND mentally - after marriage

Serena said...

I have to confess, Charles, that I thought an undercut was a haircut. Maybe I'd better stick to doing my fighting with words.:)

Boy, Puggy, ain't #2 the truth. It truly is a Wally world. I'm pleased to hear about #3 and, er, wish you well with #7. #11 doesn't say much for holy dread, er, wedlock, huh?:-)

ThatGreenyFlower said...

1. Many paths lead to the same ice cream store.
2. All roads lead to Poughkeepsie.
3. Don't look to me for tea and a foot massage.
4. If it fails, you have no one to blame but the CEO.
5. It's late, I'm tired, and I'm going to strangle someone.
6. Tell that to me one more time and I still won't think it's funny.
7. I'll think about it in the morning with fantastic, glorious regret.
8. When all else fails, reboot.
9. Life is a journey to the moon...and back.
10. Nothin' says lovin' like pina coladas and gettin' caught in the rain.
11. Britney Spears, queen of the wild frontier.

Serena said...

Poughkeepsie, Greeny? Hmmm. Your #5 and #7 rock.:)