Wednesday, September 19, 2007


I'm in the mood for waxing poetic on the magical, mystical properties of chocolate. Ooooooo. Ahhhhhhhhhh. Oh, excuse me. Sorry, I got carried away for a second. Let me just grab a napkin real quick to take care of the drool.

I taste chocolate
And hear boom-shaka-laka...
Orgy of senses.

The darker it is,
The sweeter the sensation --
Chocolate delight.

Ohhhhhhhh. Excuse me again. See, the girl can't help it. I received a decadently delightful stash of chocolate yesterday -- light, dark, darker, deepest dark -- and I'm a little OD'd on chocolate and deep in the throes of sweet sensory overload. I should perhaps stop eating it before I develop Bubble Butt Syndrome. I should give the remaining chocolate to homeless Transylvanian tech support people who moonlight as contortionists, shouldn't I? That would be the decent thing to do. Yeah, that'll happen.

The word "chocolate" comes from the Aztec, derived from the Nahuatl word xocolatl, which is a combination of the words xocolli, meaning "bitter," and atl, meaning "water." Yes, people used to drink much more chocolate than they ate. The Aztecs associated chocolate with Xochiquetzal, the goddess of fertility. Chocolate is also associated with the Mayan god of fertility, but the use of chocolate pre-dates Mayan civilization.

Chocolate comes from the cacao seed. Cacao trees grow only grow twenty degrees north and twenty degrees south of the equator, and the temperature for cacao trees cannot drop below sixty degrees Fahrenheit.

Chocolate contains alkaloids such as theobromine and phenethylamine, which produce certain physiological effects on the body; e.g., it has been linked to serotonin levels in the brain and scientists claim that chocolate, eaten in moderation, can lower blood pressure. Dark chocolate is a rich source of the flavonoids epicatechin and gallic acid, which are thought to be beneficial to heart health. Cocoa also has a significant antioxidant action, protecting against LDL oxidation, perhaps more than other polyphenol antioxidant-rich foods and beverages. Processing cocoa with alkali destroys most of the flavonoids, though. Some studies have also observed a modest reduction in blood pressure and flow-mediated dilation after consuming approximately 100g of dark chocolate daily. Milk chocolate or white chocolate, however, appears to largely negate the health benefits.

Chocolate has been used for centuries to suppress coughing (and more effectively than codeine), as a cure for diarrhea, as a stimulant, and as an aphrodisiac (though that may derive from the pure, simple sensual pleasure of eating it).

I'm slinking off now to sneak another piece of chocolat. I don't even care if my behind balloons to the size of Mont Saint-Michel.

Today's TWISTED LINGUISTICS were submitted to a sort of forensic linguist, with these results:-

wreck havoc - The chaos in the aftermath of an auto accident.

retorical - Restoration done with historical accuracy.

course language - The language of professors.

Weather you do or don't - You'll either get rained on or you won't.

Who'll be brave enough to tackle this one? Jepperdise

And from that wild and wacky "editor" person:

at lease

You Are 24% Gross

You're a tad gross, but generally you're a clean, hygienic person.
No one can be perfectly clean all the time, and it's better to be human than a neat freak.


Trée said...

Just be careful not to get chocolate on that primrose sweater. I'd hate to have to come over there and clean it off. :-D

Serena Joy said...

LOL, Tr�e. I'll try to be careful but I'm not that worried since you're standing by with a cleaning rag.:)

VE said...

And did you know Chocolate syrup was used to represent blood in the famous 45 second shower scene in Alfred Hitchcock's movie, "Psycho"?

Kanrei said...

I am allergic to chocolate. Also milk. Guess what my favorite drink was as a kid. I hope this post doesn't give me a headache. =D

Serena Joy said...

Yuck, VE. If I weren't so in love with chocolate, the thought of that might make me a bit queasy. I'll just have to buck up and not be a sissy about it.:)

Oh, you poor, poor Kanrei! If I were allergic to chocolate, I guess I'd have to get my jollies with gummy bears or something. Yug. I'm so sorry you're denied the thousand and one delights of chocolate.:)

Kanrei said...

They tired other things in Psycho, but nothing looked like real blood on the screen, including real blood.

Serena Joy said...

I remember reading that tidbit once upon a time. I can see why the syrup would look realistic. Now I'm going to have to try and forget that again before I eat any more chocolate.:)

Anonymous said...

I like your blog but after the first page the left side is cut off and missing letters- also when I click on anything like a quiz or comments when I try to go back to where I was I am back on page one and have to scroll through every page again. -and there is no place for generalized comments.

Charles said...

I think I'm pretty much immune to the effects of chocolate. Other than enjoying the taste, the only time it seems to do anything for me is if I mix it in with my coffee, then it seems to be pretty effective to keep me awake for driving. I never have understood the descriptions of how pleasurable it is, other than the taste.

Am I being told I can't do generalized comments here? I thought all my comments were.

Lee said...

Forget about the waxing on lyrically about chocolate...I'm just interested in the eating of it!

G-Man said...

Serena Joy...?
How can you just happen to receive some Chocolate out of the blue?
Was it your birthday?
A special occassion?
Was it 'the good stuff'?
You sure seem inspired over this...
Someone must be trying to tell you something..
...PS..Your Butt is just fine...and I DO mean FINE!!

Serena Joy said...

I'm so sorry you experienced those problems with my page, Anonymous. I don't know how to explain it, other than perhaps browser anomaly. I haven't heard anyone else mention experiencing that, so I'm at a complete loss. Sorry.

The taste IS what's so pleasurable about chocolate, Charles. It tastes like nothing else on earth, I think.:)

I'm not sure what generalized comments are. Is that some feature I'm lacking?

Lee, the eating of it is pleasure enough to qualify as lyrical and VERY interesting.:-)

Chocolate appeared out of the blue, Galen, because the Six Gift Fairies were looking out for me. And they acquitted themselves well. It was NOT my birthday, but a pretty special occasion nonetheless. And oh, yes, it was indeed the good stuff, and it inspired me, and I received a message. My derriere thanks you for the vote of confidence and only hopes it won't reach the size of Gibraltar this century.:)

ThatGreenyFlower said...

I think it's how much I hate cleaning the tile shower that tipped my balance over into gross-land. Whoopsie-doodle!

I'm not really a chocoholic, Serena, although I do like it and rarely turn it down. It just doesn't send me into paroxysms of joy like it does to some. My husband thinks of it as a necessary nutrient--like a vitamin or something. He feels deficient sometimes and has to megadose to get back in balance. I think it's cute and kind of funny.

Serena Joy said...

I'm gross, too, Greeny, my Little Sister in Grossness. LOL.

There are times when I can take chocolate or leave it, and then there are times (like this) when I can't get enough because it just tastes like such ambrosia. God knows, if I ate it like this all the time I'd soon be too big for my britches.:-)

Scary Monster said...

Seein howz me be 80% gross, Me believes me will just buy a choco-bar, let it sit in me car all day and lick the stuff offa the foil when me be finished slaving away fer the day.


Becky Mushko said...

I'll give the Twisted Linguistics a shot:

Jepperdise: a state of ecstacy akin to paradise for a Jeopardy fan who finds a channel that shows nothing but jeopardy re-runs, OR a pair of dice rolled to determine who will answer the question when a bunch of friends are watching Jeopardy together.

OK, now may I have some chocolate?

Serena Joy said...

LOL, Scary. 80%, huh? Wow, I'm in awe.:-)

Since you defined the impossible word, Becky, yes, you may have a piece of chocolate. Light or dark?:)

Camille Alexa said...

Sorry: can't answer now. Going to store for chocolate.

Serena Joy said...

LOL, Camille. Be sure to get the good stuff.:)

Sling said...

Becky said what I was gonna say!...Can I have some chocolate too?

Serena Joy said...

Sure you can, Sling. It's the thought that counts.:)

MONA said...

Chocolate! One thing I cannot decide if I like or not!

Sometimes I like it sometimes I don't

I rarely eat them! Am neither tempted by them!

Serena Joy said...

It's good that you're not prone to chocolate temptation, Mona.:)