Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Night of the Living Dread


I laid down on the couch this afternoon for a 20-minute nap and had the strangest experience. I must have fallen deeply asleep, because I must have dreamed. About what, I don't know, but when I awoke my eyes were wet. Whatever I dreamed had already brought on tears while I was still sleeping. I don't know what it was, but I awoke to an overwhelming sense of deep, indescribable -- what? Sadness? Grief? Despair? I have no idea. I had no choice but to lie there and bawl it out for a few minutes, and then it was over. I'm not much of a weeper. It takes a lot to coax a tear out of me. Whatever was in the dream must have been some humdinger. Whatever it was, was a fleeting aberration. I feel fine now.

So, onward. 'Tis the season, so we're going to have another Halloween-themed Storytime With Twisted Linguistics found around the Web today.

The words in the cast:

In the mean time
actualu
waldern books
thiung
vomity
pre-quil
publiuc
ussed car
lanturn
ashured
huvering
favporites
ussuly
aprently
reuinion
deasembled
the mnadre is gone
villion
orriginal
polticts

NIGHT OF THE LIVING DREAD

If you've already read the pre-quil, be ashured that you'll still be surprised. This is going to become one of your actualu all-time favporites, way better than the orriginal.

There was this band of dead, deasembled and disintegrating people. They were sad because their orriginal villion had dissolved into a puff of dust and gone over to the Light Side. They would sit around all night, just weeping and beating their breasts (which wasn't a good thing to do in their condition, because the beating made parts fly off) and repeating, "The mnadre is gone, the mnadre is gone." Best anyone could figure, the mnadre was their mother figure. The Madre. They may have been Spanish Undead.

Now all this happened in the mean time, not the nice time. One night, they were bored and they decided to take a lanturn and go out in publiuc. They put on thiungs and proceeded to the Waldern Books at the mall. The Departed One had always liked to read, so they were hoping for a mnadre and child reuinion in the Voodoo aisle. They hot-wired and stole a ussed car with a bitchen sound system to get there.

Customers were ussuly huvering near the coffee counter in the rear of the store, talking polticts, so nobody noticed when they first came in.

And then someone caught a whiff of the smell. And looked up. And screamed. Which caused a veritable stampede of screaming and running and pure, unadulterated dread. Some of them commenced to vomity, especially when the gruesome band of aprently dead zombies began eating alive those who hung behind because they couldn't run very fast.

The carnage stopped only when a film crew, also wearing thiungs -- sequined ones -- and dreads, showed up and promised the zombies they were going to be stars someday. The zombies were ashured off to Hollywood, where they starred in their very own movie and went on to make a couple of sequels. You just might be able to catch them on TV this weekend. We hope they don't makee you vomity.

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

Man I had one of those the other night.....I dreamt, god knows what, and in my dream I just started to cry like I had never cried....I felt sick all day with a strange sense of gloom and doom....I hate those...

Serena Joy said...

Seriously?! What IS this? Do you think we ought to call Stephen King? Seriously, wasn't that just the damndest thing? I wish I could remember the dream. To tell you the truth, I'm still feeling a bit of a "gloom hangover," but not enough to cry. Strange.

Tomas said...

While reading your blog, I enjoy the fly of your words and smell the street that I never had walked.
Thank you.

Serena Joy said...

Thanks so much for the kind words, Tomas. That just made my day.:)

Anonymous said...

I woke myself up one time a few years ago to me yelling "I said f8ckin' stop already!" No idea what I was dreaming. Saturday was weirder though. I took a nap on my couch and woke up in my bed, undressed and under the covers.

Serena Joy said...

Finally! I can get into my own blog and everybody else's non-beta blogs. All this "down time" is getting on my nerves. :(

I don't know what to say about your weird experience Sat., Kan. We're having these weird dreams, crying fits, and unexplained undressings. Something's going on. I don't think it's mass psychosis. But it could be. More likely, it's some kind of bizarre Halloween phenomenon. Strange.

RexZeitgiest said...

I only have dreams like that once or twice every 5 years or so...I hope its a long time until I have another...

Liz said...

You say you don't cry much, Serena (that's like me) so maybe your body/soul needs a release and your sub-conscious steps in.

I think I've probably only had one of those dreams one or twice; I've had happy dreams when I wake and I desperately want to get back into my dream - but can't.

Love the story as well. It's bfaib! How do you come up with them so quickly?!

Serena Joy said...

Ooo, bfaib! Cool word. The stories are like 10-15 minutes of free association and figuring out where the Words Gone Wild can be plugged in. Since I'm creating them with nonsensical words, I figure they don't have to make a lot of sense. LOL.

Steve G said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Roxan said...

Yesterday morning I reset the alarm to get up a bit later. Fell asleep and dreamed I woke up late.

Serena Joy said...

LOL, Roxan. I overslept for real yesterday. Today, too.

Steve G said...

This would make a great story for Hollywood. I read where Stephen King is going to branch out into Romance novels.

Serena Joy said...

Stephen King Romance novels with characters having mass hallucinations -- that could work. The plot would hinge on whether they were possessed, alien abductees, or just plain nuts.

You're not having these weird dreams, too, are you, Steve? :)