Monday, January 03, 2011

...and Charity

Charity creates a multitude of sins.

~Oscar Wilde

Charity extends only so far, don't you think?

When you help someone and, in the bargain, help him or her to help him- or herself, you both feel better for it. True charity, selflessly rendered, is a good and noble thing.

When you help someone over and over again and they keep falling back into the same behaviors, there comes a time when you have to say "Enough." I don't get it when someone else insists on perpetually being there to pick that person back up, every single time, no matter what they've done, forever after, ad infinitum. To me, that's just enabling. Don't you have to open your eyes and see the light of day sometime? Perhaps the aid giver sees it as extra keys to heaven, but I don't believe it's helping the recipient find anything but more excuses to screw up.

Is it just me?


Marion said...

I agree with you, SJ. At some point you have to teach the person to fish instead of giving him fish so he can take care of himself. I give to the local food bank and they have a careful screening process and help the truly needy. I've been hungry in my life's journey before food banks even existed, so I chose the food bank as my main charity.

One thing I've learned is that you can't outgive God or the Universe or whatever you want to call it. I always seem to get back way more than I give, always! (I guess that's karma, right?) Ray says I have the best book karma of anyone he's ever known...BUT I've given away thousands of books. LOL! Isn't life a trip??

Love & Blessings,

"As she has planted, so does she harvest; such is the field of karma." ~Sri Guru Granth Sahib

puerileuwaite said...

I dunno. If I agree with you, in a way that makes me an enabler.

Serena said...

I'm a firm believer in karma, Marion. Life surely is a trip. If I make it to the final destination in one piece, I'll be happy.:)

But you can enable ME, Pugsley. I am, after all, the exception.;)

quid said...

A fine line between charity/helpfulness and enabling.
I cross it too much, myself. An excellent post!


Serena said...

Thanks, Quid. It is a very fine line sometimes, isn't it?