Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Quest for Fire

Diogenes spent his days traipsing the streets of Athens with a lighted lantern, searching for an honest man. He never found one.

How well would we hold up in the light of Diogenes's lantern? Probably pretty well, for the most part. I think most people are basically honest. I'd like to think so, anyway.

There are some people who lie routinely. You know who they are; their lips are moving. They don't represent the norm, though, and thank God for that.

Paris Hilton now thinks she's a great singer. Is she lying? Nah; just deluded. The dumbest student in the science lab (or on the planet, for that matter) could tell her that.

Tom Cruise says he quit Paramount Studios. Paramount says it fired him. The truth probably lies somewhere in the middle.

Sometimes, there's a fine line between the straight truth and a lie. The truth is the truth, of course, but when you embellish it just the least little bit, doesn't it become a lie? And then there's the faction that embellishes lies with just enough truth to sell it. Those types are often found in politics. Surely, they're emitting fumes from all the lies. Why, if Diogenes were to approach them, they'd probably spontaneously combust.

I'm sorry, I'm just endlessly fascinated with the whole concept of spontaneous combustion. I already know I'm strange; you don't need to tell me that.

The Word Patrol rescued a few battered words today and rushed them straight to Word Rehab. With a little TLC, it is hoped they can be rehabilitated. If not, they'll have to be put down.

But how ever -- This phrase is so mangled it's hopeless.

Awsome -- Aw, how cute - somebody's spreading some awe.

Yall -- This clearly isn't a Southerner. We're born knowing how to spell y'all. Therefore, they must be referring to a sailing ship that they didn't know how to spell.

Beatiful -- I'm proposing this one for beatification.

Thankyou -- Either they're talking to a rapper named T-Hank or they don't know that thank you is two words.

Imput -- I'd thank this one for his input and then run.

Dose not -- Literally, "take no medicine."

Recind -- A new, highly abridged retelling of the Cinderella story.

Seperate -- I'm tired of seeing this one, so it's going on the list to be put down. Rehab obviously hasn't worked.

4 comments:

Unknown said...

Spelling is optional =D.
There is never a word that is spelled wrong, just someone who is expressing creative writing. I know because I am one of the most creative spellers there is.

Serena said...

Is THAT what it is? Well, I'm all for creativity. Carry on. Coming soon to a locked theatre near you: LemmingAid - Save the Lemmings.:)

Unknown said...

I used to drive my creative writing teacher mad in college with that one. Everytime she said I spelled something wrong I would say "but isn't this creative writing?" Needless to say I didn't pass =D

Serena said...

Heh. I say we look her up and force her to tour the Word Rehab ward. Once she regains consciousness, she'll think you're a freakin' genius.:)